Nowadays, social media has become a fundamental part of our daily lives. However, there is increasing evidence that it is having a negative impact on our quality of life. That is why in this newsletter I will talk about how and why to quit social media. Or, if not quit it, at least use it in a healthy way.
Specifically, social media is seriously affecting our self-esteem, concentration, and real connection with people. In turn, it is also generating an increase in mental disorders such as anxiety and depression. Below, we will take a deeper look at the factors that generate these negative effects. We will also discuss some strategies that can help us minimize them. And finally, we will see how we can use them in a more conscious and beneficial way.
To begin with, we must bear in mind that most people tend to use social media as a way to fill a void in their lives. Instead of looking for real solutions to their problems, they turn to these platforms. They choose to distract themselves and escape from what distresses, worries or displeases them, instead of looking for solutions in the real world. However, this can be counterproductive since, instead of solving the problem, social media can make it even worse.
Negative effects on self-esteem
The problem is that social media is no longer just a place to post and read your friends' posts. It used to be that way. But now, they've reprogrammed your experience to be all about social approval indicators: the likes, the comments, the number of followers.
Every time we log on to a social network, we are checking whether people agree with us or not, whether they like our photos, whether the person we like checked out our latest Story, whether our followers have increased, or anything else that might make us feel good. We are constantly validating our status, our attractiveness, our intelligence, our popularity, and arguably our entire existence through them. And so, this makes us increasingly dependent on those approval indicators, resulting in serious consequences for our self-esteem.
When people don’t receive enough validation, they start to feel bad about themselves and question their worth and attractiveness, which also leads to comparison with others. The fact that users are inclined to post only their best photos and “happiest moments” creates an idealized version of everyone. As a result, people become more insecure and dissatisfied with their own lives, comparing themselves to the perfect images they see there.
Negative effects on concentration
Likewise, every time we receive a notification, a like, a new follower, or anything similar, our brain releases dopamine, making us feel good momentarily. However, constant exposure to these stimuli causes the dopamine baseline to rise greatly, meaning we will need to receive greater stimuli more frequently to feel the same level of pleasure as before. This is the essence of their strategy to addict us and push us to return to them again and again throughout the day. Because of this, staying focused on a single activity becomes dramatically boring, leading us to constantly look for the slightest thing to divert our attention from what we are doing.
It should be noted that this intolerance to concentration and focus, due to the dependence on constant stimuli, is not only caused by social media. But it has been shown that they play a very important role in this.
Negative effects on relationships
On the other hand, it is ironic that social media is promoted as a way to better connect with others, when what it is actually doing is hindering real connections. It turns out that, despite its accessibility and ease of interacting with other people, its existence is not always positive. In fact, we become so addicted to using it that we end up putting much more weight on interacting with strangers online, than on real interactions with the most important people in our lives.
We spend hours scrolling through our feeds, and in doing so we miss the opportunity to engage with the real world. We lose sight of what really matters: connection and meaning. If you think about it, it’s easy enough to leave a happy birthday message on a friend’s Facebook profile, or to give them a positive comment through a post, but that’s not the same as taking the time to call or visit them to share a meaningful experience with them. True connection goes way beyond two lines of text and a heart emoji.
They have taken our relationships into a world of immediacy and superficiality. Now we want everything fast and easy, without putting effort or time into building something deeper. These platforms have given us the illusion of an immediate and constant connection, when in reality we are losing the true essence of a meaningful connection.
Negative effects on mental health
Finally, there is a strong link between social media and anxiety and depression. Numerous studies support this. For example, a 2018 study published in the Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology found that limiting social media use for just three weeks significantly improved participants’ psychological well-being. Another 2020 study published in the journal Depression and Anxiety found that social media use was associated with a higher prevalence of depressive and anxiety symptoms in adolescents. And this is not even close to all the research that has been done to make the same claim.
In conclusion, social media can negatively affect mental health by generating social comparison, pressure to maintain a perfect image, lack of sleep, social disconnection, loneliness, among a number of other things.
Stop giving away your time
And… what about all the time we spend on them?
It's common to hear people say that they don't have enough time to do the kind of activities that could improve their quality of life. However, these same people spend more than two hours a day on social media, which means they have a considerable amount of time that they could use for something else.
If they would only spend their time on activities that would actually bring them benefits, they could achieve amazing results. But they don't. So they never get healthier, learn how to earn more money, or become a respected person in their community. These are all desires that most of us have, but many of us tend to waste time and energy on distractions that prevent us from achieving them.
Nowadays, social media apps offer the ability to see how much time you’ve spent on each of them. I invite you to look it up and add up all the hours you waste on it per week. Then, ask yourself what your life would be like if you only invested that time in other activities such as having strong interactions with people you care about, self-reflection, exercising, developing skills, or working on a startup. I assure you that it wouldn’t take long for you to start experiencing a very positive change in the areas that matter most to you.
Using social media the right way
Now, of course, social media has proven its usefulness in many ways. It connects us with people around the world, keeps us up to date with news, and can be used to learn skills or gain knowledge. But beyond its useful side, the problem lies in the lack of control people have over it. Do we use social media for positive purposes and control its impact on our lives? Or are we controlled by its algorithm, leading us down a path that does not necessarily benefit us?
There are also many who use them to sell, promote their business or grow their personal brand. It is important that, if that is your case, you treat them as what they are: a tool. That is, use them professionally and not become dependent on them. This involves having a clear focus and a strategic plan. It involves setting concrete objectives and, above all, not allowing their use to distract you from what really matters to you.
Ultimately, it is about being aware that social media can be a great tool if used responsibly. But if we allow the algorithm to control us and we give in to social pressure, we will be allowing it to negatively affect us, as we have already seen.
Be aware of the time you spend on them and make sure you use them strategically and in a controlled manner. Filter the people and topics you follow so you can create a digital environment that only provides you with positive information. Avoid falling into dependence or addiction by all means. Always do it responsibly and in a way that is beneficial for you. That's the key.